My new book of monologues is now available
on Amazon.com called
“Bullied, Bungled and Botched”
by D. M. Larson
ISBN-13: 978-1518661082
This book includes the following monologues:
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Bullying and depression book of monologues now published
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"Used Up in Cubical Land" monologue from published play "Death of an Insurance Salesman"
USED UP IN CUBICAL LAND
by
D. M. Larson
From the published play "Death of an Insurance Salesman"
SUE
He has wanted a promotion ever since he got here... wow, it's been a lot of years. But they keep passing him over for some "new blood" from some other company. They never promote any of us. No matter how hard we work, none of us get a shot. It's always an outsider, some guy with new and exciting ideas to revitalize the company. Or someone who brings secrets from another company they can steal. We're all used up here in cubicle-land. Useless.
Why do I stay? Why do I keep a job I hate?
It's easy... I sometimes thought about getting other jobs, but everything requires special skills or a lot of hard work. Here... they just keep us... we never seem to get fired... we're just settled in our spaces, waiting for something to happen, something to change... or hoping it doesn't so we don't have to work any harder.
Just do enough work to stay unnoticed and hope someone else does enough work to keep us all in a job.
END OF MONOLOGUE
***
For permission to use this monologue, please contact doug@freedrama.net (include the title "USED UP IN CUBICAL LAND" in your request")
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↧
Looking for a dark comedy stage play? "Death of an Insurance Salesman" is a published play by D. M. Larson
My new play Death of an Insurance Salesman is here! Here is the new poster for the play by my wife Shiela Larson.
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Here are some monologues from the play:
"Nervous" monologue for female:
"Guardians of the Wallet" monologue for male actor:
"I Deserve It" - monologue for male
"Almost Rich" - monologue for male
http://freedramaplays.blogspot.com/2015/02/almost-rich-monologue-for-male-from.html
The play is now available at Amazon.com!
The play is now available at Amazon.com!
- ISBN-13: 978-1518665547
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Crowdfunding How to Start a Part Time Posse funny sketch comedy for 2 actors
Crowdfunding
(How to Start a Part Time Posse)
by D. M. Larson
SCENE
(A customer, PAT approaches JULES who is a salesperson at a marketing firm)
PAT
I’d like to buy myself a crowd.
JULES
What?
PAT
I’d like to buy a crowd… I heard you handle crowdfunding and I need a crowd. You know… like a posse?
JULES
That’s not exactly what crowdfunding is.
PAT
I want to look important and if I have a crowd following me around, that will make everything think there’s something special about me.
JULES
I’m afraid that’s not exactly what we do.
PAT
When you’re growing up, everyone tells you that you’re special. Your parents, your teachers, your parole officer....
JULES
Parole officer? Um… maybe I should call someone.
PAT
Yes, call together my team… team Pat. Or maybe I should pick something more dramatic like Team Washington. Makes me sound like I’m a politician or something.
JULES
Are you a politician?
PAT
No, but I need that crowd. You going to help me?
JULES
Well… would these people be your employees? Or would they be a part time posse?
PAT
Part time would work… I’d just like them around at certain key times like school reunions, family gatherings and court dates… I need someone to cheer me on… I need someone who has my back. I need to be supported. I want to feel like I’m important and that I matter.
JULES
Actually, I think that’s what most people want.
PAT
Then maybe this is the start of new business… or a revolution! We could rent out the part time posse to other people with low self-esteem like me and help build them up. That will give them a nice little boost at key times in their lives.
JULES
Okay, I see what you’re saying. I’m starting to dig this.
PAT
So what do you say? You going to help me fund my crowd?
JULES
Well… I am in this band and we play every Friday night and not many people come. If I could rent them every Friday...
PAT
There you go… crowd... funded. Part time posse plan in motion.
JULES
You just need to fill out this online form.
PAT
Online?
JULES
On your computer.
PAT
I don’t have one.
JULES
Do you have a smart phone?
PAT
I don’t trust smart gadgets.
JULES
That explains why you didn’t know about crowdfunding. I’ll help with the online form then… any other questions before we get started?
PAT
Yeah… I’m curious about those news programs that you can talk to… where you can become the friends of the newscasters? I really like the morning news team on channel 13. I’d love to socialize with them.
JULES
I’m not sure I’ve heard of that.
PAT
You know… social media.
JULES
Oh! Well… um.... let’s tackle your crowdfunding first. Then we’ll… um… figure out the next one.
PAT
Then you gotta tell me how to keep people from googling me. That sounds creepy.
JULES
All in good time my friend. All in good time.
END OF SCENE
***
For permission to use this play, please email doug@freedrama.net (include the title "Crowdfunding" in your request).
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"Call for Help" scene for 2 male actors from Death of an Insurance Salesman
"CALL FOR HELP"
by
D. M. Larson
(GIL enters and goes up to RALPH. GIL is grabbing his chest and looks very sick... like a heart attack. RALPH sees GIL and jumps up)
RALPH
Are you okay?
GIL
Fine, fine. I need some insurance... now.
RALPH
You don't look so good. I better call…
GIL
No! No... I'm fine. I need some of your life insurance... now.
RALPH
Um... well... if you're sure you don't need any help.
GIL
No... please... insurance... now.
RALPH
Oh... okay. I remember you were looking at several policies last time you came by...
GIL
The one for heart attacks...
RALPH
With the mega care add on?
GIL
Right... mega... add…
(GIL is fading and slipping out of his chair)
RALPH
I really should call someone.
(GIL pulls himself back up)
GIL
No, I'm great... never better... give me the policy!
RALPH
Well, there are several options…
GIL
Give me the best…
RALPH
That will require some underwriting... we'll have to fill out this paperwork…
GIL
Never mind... what's the quickest option?
RALPH
Level 1 and 2 are simple... no underwriting.
GIL
Give me those.
RALPH
You just need one.
GIL
Give me the better one... now... please…
RALPH
Well, I have a lot of your information on file... just sign here and we'll get this processed for you.
(GIL struggles to sign and finally manages with some help from RALPH)
GIL
We good?
RALPH
I'll just need a payment... you can do a credit card or here is a form for payroll deduction…
GIL
Credit card…
(GIL struggles to get wallet and gets card with Ralph's help)
RALPH
I'll run this now for you.
GIL
Now... yes, please…
RALPH
And there we go. Looks like you're good to go.
GIL
So I'm covered…
RALPH
Yes.
GIL
For say... a heart attack.
RALPH
Yes.
GIL
Good.
(GIL falls on the floor)
GIL (CONT.)
You can call for help now.
(GIL passes out and RALPH gets on his phone)
END OF SCENE
***
For permission to use this scene, please email doug@freedrama.net (include the title “Call for Help” in the request)
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"Salesman of the Year" monologue for male from Death of an Insurance Salesman
"SALESMAN OF THE YEAR"
short dramatic monologue
by
D. M. Larson
(RALPH stops working and looks sadly at a little trophy on his desk)
RALPH
Salesman of the year. Things looked really good back then. They're not looking so good anymore. They haven't looked good for a long time. Something has to change. I can't keep spinning my wheels like this. I need to move forward or move on. I work hard... I deserve more. I deserve respect. Real, genuine respect. Not just plastic statues, but real meaningful gestures that show I am important to this company. I've worked hard for them. I made this company better. But this place is making me worse.
(Ralph has squeezed the statue and it has broken in his hand. He looks at the broken pieces and then tosses them in the trash. He buries his face in this hands and lights fade to black)
END OF SCENE
***
For permission to use this monologue, contact doug@freedrama.net (please include the title "Salesman of the Year" in your request).
From the published play "Death of an Insurance Salesman"
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"The Boogie Man" 2 actors (1m 1f) from Death of an Insurance Salesman
“The Boogie Man”
a scene for two actors
by D. M. Larson
(MINDY goes up to RALPH'S desk and leaves him a present. She pretends to talk to him)
MINDY
Hi, I'm Mindy - I've been watching you... no, no sounds creepy. Hi, I'm Mindy. I enjoyed the seminar you have last week on customer service techniques. I thought you were wonderful... Amazing... I mean. No, no... Too much. I found it very informative. I've been to all your staff trainings. I never miss one. I'm always in the front row. I'm always early. I wanted to give you a little something... To let you know that we appreciate all the help you give to the rest of is... To all help you give me. You really care about people... I don't think anyone notices all the hard work you do. But I do. And that's why I wanted to give you this. Because you make a difference... You make a difference for me.
(PETE hears her - comes from shadows. Claps)
PETE
Very touching.
MINDY
You bastard. Were you listening to me? Why are you so creepy?
PETE
You used to like it when I lurked in the shadows, waiting for you.
MINDY
I never liked that. I've never liked your games.
PETE
So now you're turning your attention to Ralphie.
MINDY
We're done okay? I told you that.
PETE
Then this is the point in the relationship where I give you a pink slip.
MINDY
You can't so that... I'll sue you...
PETE
My lawyers are way better than your lawyers I'm sure. Besides... When I give a pink slip it's very final. My pink slips are permanent. You'll be done... Never to be heard from again.
MINDY
You're scaring me.
PETE
For some reason, I like that. I've always liked that. I want people to fear me. That must be what royalty felt like - ruling with an iron fist - having people fear them - cast aside the useless - punish those who won't obey.
(Mindy has left)
Run, run, as fast as you can. You can't get away from me, I'm the boogie man.
END OF SCENE
***
For permission to use this scene, please contact doug@freedrama.net (include the title "The Boogie Man" in your request)
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"Dead End Job" scene for 3 actors from Death of an Insurance Salesman
"DEAD END JOB"
Scene for 3 actors (2 male, 1 female)
from a published play
by D. M. Larson
(MINDY is dressed in a trench coat, hat and sunglasses, looking fashionable mysterious)
Scene for 3 actors (2 male, 1 female)
from a published play
by D. M. Larson
(MINDY is dressed in a trench coat, hat and sunglasses, looking fashionable mysterious)
MINDY
Alone at last.
RALPH
What are you doing here?
MINDY
I got lonely... you've been gone all day.
RALPH
I went to all the trouble to hide you and get you somewhere safe... and now you're back here again. In the thick of it. There's a cop here.
MINDY
How exciting.
RALPH
No it's not. It's dangerous. I want you to be safe. I want to take care of you.
MINDY
You're so sweet. That's why I couldn't stay away from you. I need you. I need more of last night.
RALPH
That was pretty nice.
MINDY
I thought you hated this place. I thought you wanted to give up on this dead end job and run away with me.
RALPH
I do. I’m tired of doing everything right. I’m tired of following all the rules. Where has it gotten me? I’m in a dead end job where I get passed over for promotion after promotion. I do more on this floor than everyone put together. But hard work isn’t what matters. It’s all about being someone’s friend, someone’s drinking buddy… a good old boy is who succeeds. I just wanted to do my job. I just wanted to be really really good at it and get rewarded for my hard work. Is that too much to ask? It’s too much to expect I guess. Somehow I got this powerful work ethic pounded into me at an early age. I’m sick of it though. It’s draining the life out of me… and I haven’t even lived.
But when we ran away together… something changed… I was excited for the first time in my life… Something inside me broke free… my soul perhaps… my spirit… it had been caged up and hidden away. But you had the key… the key to free my soul and give it wings.
I sound crazy don’t I? I feel a little crazy now. Crazy in a good way. Crazy in the best way possible. And it’s because of you. Somehow you found a way to help me escape the nightmare of my life… the living death that entombed me. But now I am free.
That night we spent together… it was the best night of my life. I have never been so happy. I’m not ever sure I knew what happy was before last night. I never wanted it to end.
MINDY
Then why did you leave you jerk? Why did you come back here?
RALPH
I wanted to come back to make sure we were taken care of.
MINDY
What do you mean?
RALPH
I have a plan… something that will make sure we’re taken care of for a long time.
MINDY
You are crazy.
RALPH
I know… isn’t it grand?
(MAX, the police detective, enters)
MAX
Grand indeed. Hello, Ralph. I see you’re working late.
RALPH
Don't you know it's not polite to listen to people's private conversations?
MAX
But it sounded so close to a confession that I couldn't help myself.
RALPH
Aren't you a little foolish to confront a suspected killer alone? Or do you have a SWAT team waiting outside?
MAX
This is a high profile case. Your boss has a lot of important friends who want to see his killer pay for what he... or she... has done. I don't want some lazy commissioner waltzing in at the last minute and taking all the credit for this. This is my case and I want to follow this to the end.
RALPH
Well, the end is near. So no one knows you're here? All alone... no backup? Cocky... and stupid.
(RALPH pulls a gun)
MINDY
I wondered where my gun went.
RALPH
I thought I might need it again.
MINDY
Good thinking.
MAX
You're Mindy right?
MINDY
What's it to you?
MAX
Mindy... you really think you can trust, Ralph?
MINDY
I'd trust him with my life.
MAX
What if I told you he took out a life insurance policy on you today?
MINDY
What?
MAX
Planning on collecting now or later, Ralph?
MINDY
What's he talking about?
RALPH
I did take one out on her. With myself as the beneficiary. But I also took one out on you Max. And I plan on collecting yours tonight.
(RALPH shoots MAX)
MINDY
What's going on, Ralph? Did you really take out a policy on me? Are you going to kill me?
RALPH
Never.
(Ralph gives her the gun)
RALPH (CONT.)
In fact, I took one out on myself. With you as the beneficiary...
MINDY
I'm still mad.
RALPH
Yours is for twice as much... you'll get a million if I die.
MINDY
Really? Okay, you're forgiven.
RALPH
I also backdated a policy on Pete which I've collected on already. Now we have Max to add to our retirement funds.
MINDY
But won't they figure out what we're up to?
RALPH
That's why I've been here all day. I used fake names and accounts that are difficult to track. I know this system better than the designers. By the time they sort it all out we'll be long gone.
MINDY
I love you... you're amazing! Run away with me... for real this time. Don't just send me away and leave me alone. I can't be alone.
RALPH
You'll never be alone. Never again. We'll always be together... forever. And never another worry again.
MINDY
I knew you would make all my dreams come true.
RALPH
You're better than dreams. You're better than anything I can imagine.
MINDY
Where are we going? Mexico? Cuba? Russia?
RALPH
How about Montana?
MINDY
Montana?
RALPH
Big, beautiful and empty. That's the last place they'll look.
MINDY
Sounds lovely... isn't it cold there?
RALPH
I'll get you some warm fuzzy boots.
MINDY
I love fuzzy boots. Let's go, lover.
END OF SCENE
***
For permission to use this scene, please email doug@freedrama.net (include the title "Dead End Job" in your request).
For the published play, "Death of an Insurance Salesman"
***
For permission to use this scene, please email doug@freedrama.net (include the title "Dead End Job" in your request).
For the published play, "Death of an Insurance Salesman"
↧
"Watching You" short monologue for female
"Watching You"
short monologue for woman
by D. M. Larson
(MINDY goes up to RALPH'S desk and leaves him a present. She pretends to talk to him)
MINDY
Hi, I'm Mindy - I've been watching you... no, no sounds creepy. Hi, I'm Mindy. I enjoyed the seminar you have last week on customer service techniques. I thought you were wonderful... Amazing... I mean. No, no... Too much. I found it very informative. I've been to all your staff trainings. I never miss one. I'm always in the front row. I'm always early. I wanted to give you a little something... To let you know that we appreciate all the help you give to the rest of is... To all help you give me. You really care about people... I don't think anyone notices all the hard work you do. But I do. And that's why I wanted to give you this. Because you make a difference... You make a difference for me.
END OF MONOLOGUE
***
For permission to use this script, please contact doug@freedrama.net (include the title "Watching You" in the request).
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↧
"Okay Gang Let's Split Up" comedy scene for 3 actors from Death of an Insurance Salesman
"OKAY GANG LET'S SPLIT UP"
funny scene for three actors
by
D. M. Larson
SCENE
(MOOSE, PARKER and ROSIE are three office workers. There is a detective investigating a murder that took place there)
MOOSE
How come he didn't ask us any questions?
(ROSIE holds up a finger to her lips and motions for them to come with her. PARKER, ROSIE and MOOSE go over to a downstage corner and try to be out of earshot of the others)
ROSIE
I don't think he bothered because we're not suspects.
PARKER
And the rest of them are?
ROSIE
Of course... they're all suspicious.
MOOSE
I say it's Sue.
ROSIE
Why?
MOOSE
Because she's mean.
ROSIE
Too obvious.
PARKER
Right. It's always the last one you suspect.
MOOSE
Like... me?
PARKER
Exactly.
MOOSE
I don't think I did it.
ROSIE
You didn't, stupid. Stop freaking him out, Parker.
PARKER
You're no fun.
ROSIE
We have to figure out who did this... and fast.
PARKER
Why?
ROSIE
Because I can't concentrate on my job knowing their might be a murderer on the other side of my cubicle.
MOOSE
But you don't do your job anyway.
ROSIE
Fine... I just don't like knowing there might be a killer in here... it's creepy.
PARKER
I wonder why he crawled to my cube?
MOOSE
You just moved into it too.
ROSIE
Who had your cube before?
PARKER
Some chick. Maybe the boss was looking for her and wanted a kiss goodbye?
ROSIE
Or maybe she was involved.
MOOSE
Who?
ROSIE
The woman who worked in this cube.
MOOSE
Parker's not a woman... is he?
PARKER
Not last time I checked.
ROSIE
What was her name?
MOOSE
Parkette?
ROSIE
What?
MOOSE
Parker's girl name is Parkette.
ROSIE
No, the name of the woman who used to work in Parker's cube before he moved over here.
MOOSE
Oh the hot one.
PARKER
I'm not hot?
(PARKER has stuffed something under his shirt so it looks like he has boobs)
MOOSE
No.
(MOOSE is poking his fake boobs)
PARKER
Is that any way to treat a lady? You really should buy me a drink first.
MOOSE
I don't think they're real.
ROSIE
Brilliant deduction, Sherlock. Speaking of detectives... maybe we better tell the cop about this.
PARKER
Better yet, maybe we could solve the mystery and become heroes.
MOOSE
And get a reward or something.
ROSIE
You know what guys? That's - the - coolest idea ever!
MOOSE
I need one of the spy glass thingies.
PARKER
I need a pipe and a hat.
ROSIE
I need glasses. Smart detective girls always have glasses.
PARKER
How many detective girls are there?
ROSIE
Velma from Scooby Doo?
MOOSE
Oh! We need a talking dog. And I'll be his friend who smokes weed.
ROSIE
Shaggy doesn't smoke weed.
MOOSE
Then why is he so hungry all the time?
ROSIE
Good point.
PARKER
Is this a clue?
(PARKER holds up a hotel room key card. RALPH sees him hold it up and panics)
RALPH
Give me that.
(RALPH grabs it and goes back to his desk)
ROSIE
Why does Ralph have a hotel room key?
MOOSE
Maybe he's on vacation.
ROSIE
Yeah, I'm sure he comes back here during the day and then vacations at night.
PARKER
Maybe he lives in a hotel. I'm not sure why'd he drive so far every day.
ROSIE
How far?
PARKER
That hotel is way out in the boonies. My family used to go out that way during summer vacation so I've seen it, but that's hours away.
ROSIE
Hmmm... so Mr. Clean might have some dirty laundry... hotel key, late to work...
MOOSE
He's late because he had to do his laundry?
ROSIE
Something like that.
PARKER
We have some good dirt already. We're such good detectives.
ROSIE
Okay, gang. Let's split up.
MOOSE
And do what?
ROSIE
I'm not sure but that's what those detectives always do.
PARKER
We have a few clues... I just need to remember the name of that girl who used to have my cube... Cindy? Mandy? Candy? Hmmm...
ROSIE
And maybe we should follow Ralph after work and see where he goes?
MOOSE
Oh and do a stakeout. I'll bring the steaks. One of you two have a bbq?
END OF SCENE
***
For permission to use this scene, please email doug@freedrama.net (include the title "Okay Gang Let's Split Up" in the request).
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"I Sound Crazy" monologue for male from Death of an Insurance Salesman
"I SOUND CRAZY"
monologue for male
by
D. M. Larson
***
RALPH
monologue for male
by
D. M. Larson
***
RALPH
I do. I’m tired of doing everything right. I’m tired of following all the rules. Where has it gotten me? I’m in a dead end job where I get passed over for promotion after promotion. I do more on this floor than everyone put together. But hard work isn’t what matters. It’s all about being someone’s friend, someone’s drinking buddy… a good old boy is who succeeds.
I just wanted to do my job. I just wanted to be really really good at it and get rewarded for my hard work. Is that too much to ask? It’s too much to expect I guess. Somehow I got this powerful work ethic pounded into me at an early age. I’m sick of it though. It’s draining the life out of me… and I haven’t even lived.
But when we ran away together… something changed… I was excited for the first time in my life… Something inside me broke free… my soul perhaps… my spirit… it had been caged up and hidden away. But you had the key… the key to free my soul and give it wings.
I sound crazy don’t I? I feel a little crazy now. Crazy in a good way. Crazy in the best way possible. And it’s because of you. Somehow you found a way to help me escape the nightmare of my life… the living death that entombed me. But now I am free.
That night we spent together… it was the best night of my life. I have never been so happy. I’m not ever sure I knew what happy was before last night. I never wanted it to end.
END OF MONOLOGUE
***
For permission to use this script, please contact doug@freedrama.net (include the title "I Sound Crazy" in the request).
For permission to use this script, please contact doug@freedrama.net (include the title "I Sound Crazy" in the request).
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Halloween monster improv theatre games (fun interactive party games or acting warm-up)
Need something fun to do today for Halloween? This is great for actors in a workshop or even for a family Halloween party. Improv games are interactive and fun for everyone.
*********
WARM-UPS
Monster Walk: Everyone gets up and walks in place. The audience or leader calls out different types of monsters that everyone must walk like. If they call Frankenstein's monster, hold out your arms and stomp. If they call call zombie, do your best Thriller moves.
Pass the Bag of Candy: Everyone gets in a circle or line if this is being watched by an audience. Take turns passing a mimed bag of candy to others (one ball at a time). Each time it reaches the leader, he/she says if the bag becomes heavier, or extremely light, extremely big (and light or heavy) or extremely small (and light or heavy) or very sticky. Actors need to show the candy's characteristics in the way it gets passed. If there is an audience and everyone is in a line, the last person in line crosses the stage to the first player and as they do, the audience can call out a suggestion of what the bag of candy turns in to.
GAMES
Documentary or Slide Show: A leader pretends to be a narrator of a documentary and the actors must act out the documentary the leader describes (do theme such as the history of horror movies or how to stop a vampire attack). They can do it as a slideshow/powerpoint with still picture poses (slide show) or actually act out what is being narrated (documentary).
Gibberish: A group of actors (group #1) are monsters and act out a scene speaking in a weird monster language. They act out a simple activity like digging a hole, preparing for a party or cooking. The other group of actors (group #2) act out the same scene and translate what was said in English.
- Variation 1: have actors translate what was said by the monsters as they act
- Variation 2: have a actor play a monster who speaks gibberish and have the other actors try to figure out what he/she is saying in a scene where an monster shows up at their door
Scary Movie in a Minute: The actors get a scary movie title from the audience and then act out the plot in one minute. Then they must act out the same thing in 30 seconds. THEN they must act it out in 10 seconds.
Stunt Doubles: 2 Actors are acting a scene such as dealing with a villain who is doing something bad. When it comes time to do a "dangerous" step (such as punching the villain) they call in their stunt doubles. The easier the "dangerous" task is, the funnier it can be (such as picking up litter).
Lines from our Pockets: The audience will write lines for the actors to say. Someone will collect the lines and not show them to the actors. The actors will act out a Halloween themed scene and then they must work the lines into the scene.
Here Comes Creepy: One actor plays Creepy who is off stage. The other two actors are shopping for costumes. The two shoppers are disappointed to see a store employee named Creepy coming to help them and describe the terrible and gross things Creepy does while he/she is off stage getting costumes for them. Creepy enters and he/she has to act like he/she is described.
Evil Inventions (aka props): All the actors are monster movie villains. Give the villains weird things they have never seen before and they must say what they do. The object can do anything except what it really does.
Questions Only: Actors get in two lines (one line is monsters and the other is monster hunters). They talk in the form of a question. If they make a statement or don't use a question, then they must go to the back of the line or the audience can shout DIE and they must do a dramatic death scene. The line with the most left at the end wins.
Stand Sit Slump: A monster hunter faces two monsters (or two monster hunters face one monster). One must be standing, one must be sitting and one must slump down on the ground. After each actor says one thing, the last actor to speak must pick a new position (stand) and the others must adjust and pick the two remaining positions (sit and slump). This can continue until a high moment of humor or until one actor majorly messes up.
Melodrama: Do an old fashioned melodrama, but with a twist. The twists will be based on suggestions from the audience.
- Have three characters: a damsel in distress, a hero, and a villain/monster
- Audience: will Boo at Villain/Monster, Cheer for Hero, Ahhh for Damsel.
- Audience will suggest... Damsel: something strange to raise on a farm (eyeballs or brains), Villain: a weird form of torture, Hero: an odd weapon someone might use to stop a villain.
Preparing for a Zombie Attack (The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly): You must decide who is giving the best advice for preparing for a zombie attack. 3 players (experts) form a line upstage. The audience provides questions or problems for which they need advice. Actor #1 always provide good advice, actors #2 always gives bad advice , and actors #3 gives really bad advice. Good advice should be good, bad should be opposite of the good and ugly should be an even worse version of bad.
Action Figures: 1-2 actors are monster action figures and 1-2 actors are damsel in distress action figures. The monsters chase the damsels but none of them can move on their own. They can only speak. 2 audience members must move them in the chase scene.
Party Quirks, Dating Game and Monster Attack: In all three of these games, three actors become Halloween characters suggested by the audience. Then you have one person who tries to guess who they are. You can have the audience write suggestions on pieces of paper before the show or you can the person guessing step outside and the audience can make suggestions.
- Party Quirks: The person guessing is the host of a party and the other actors ring the doorbell and enter one at a time as their characters creating problems at the party. The person guess must say who they are to get rid of them.
- Dating Game: The person guessing is a bachelor or bachelorette and interviews the three monsters with dating type questions (i.e. what's your ideal date? what would be a perfect place to go for a romantic vacation?). The monsters must give answers that reveal who they are without saying their names.
- Monster Attack: The person guessing is under attack by three monsters and the monsters will only die if he/she says who they are.
Share your ideas for games in the discussion below!
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For more Improv Games go to http://www.freedrama.net/improv.html
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"The Little Boy Who Likes Beer" short comedy scene for 3 actors
"Operation Redneck" is the story of three friends (Julie, Beth and Tina) who are roommates. Julie is dating a city boy named Jacob and he wants to visit her in the small town she lives in. She is worried about him fitting in and everyone want to help Jacob by turning him into the ultimate redneck like Tina's boyfriend JJ.
For permission to use this scene, contact doug@freedrama.net (please include the name of the scene “The Little Boy Who Likes Beer” in the request).
“THE LITTLE BOY WHO LIKES BEER”
by D. M. Larson
(from "Operation Redneck")
JJ: What is this all about anyway? Both of you are acting weird.
BETH: It's nothing, JJ. Drink your beer.
JJ: Wait a minute. I can put two and two together...
BETH: What'd you get? Three?
JJ: First, there's that perfect couple contest, then Tina wants to "talk", and then grilling Julie's Pa about marriage. I'm starting to see the writing on the stall!
TINA: JJ, don't get upset. It's not like that.
JJ: This is your way of dropping hints about us, ain't it Tina?
TINA: (Looks to BETH for help) Well!
JJ: Don't worry, sugar plum. I understand. Now I ain't in a position to be, buying rings just yet, but I know that when that time comes, there's a perfectly cut cubic zirconium in your future, baby.
TINA: Oh, JJ. Really?
BETH: Wow, JJ. You found us out. Yes, Tina was worried you weren't as insanely in love with her as she is with you.
JJ: (Smiles at TINA) Insane huh?
TINA: Totally and completely.
BETH: You've both got to be.
JJ: Once I'm rich and famous, I'm gonna make you Mrs. JJ Bean.
BETH: Just in time for retirement huh? (JJ and TINA are too wrapped up in each other to hear her).
TINA: You know. You could probably make enough money if you'd go work at your Uncle's Come and Go mini-market.
JJ: He won't let me work there unless I get my GED.
TINA: But he said he'd make you a night manager.
JJ: To be a night manager, he'll make me go take some classes at the community college. It's just too hard.
JULIE: I'm back. (Enters with groceries)
JJ: Hey! Food.
JULIE: It's not for you.
JJ: Who's it for?
JULIE: If you must know, it's for my boyfriend.
JJ: Ooooh. Julie's got a boyfriend. Julie's got a boyfriend.
JULIE: (To TINA) How old is he?
TINA: He's still a little boy inside.
JJ: Yea, a little boy who likes beer. Can I have another one? (Looks in grocery bag)
JULIE: No, go home.
JJ: Aw, man.
JULIE: Go mooch off your mom and dad for awhile.
JJ: But they won't give me beer. My ma hogs it all.
BETH: I guess it runs in the family. (JJ exits)
END OF SCENE
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"Nowhere Fast" short monologue for woman from Operation Redneck
"Operation Redneck" is the story of three friends (Julie, Beth and Tina) who are roommates. Julie is dating a city boy named Jacob and he wants to visit her in the small town she lives in. She is worried about him fitting in and everyone want to help Jacob by turning him into the ultimate redneck like Tina's boyfriend JJ.
For permission to use this scene, contact doug@freedrama.net (please include the name of the scene “Nowhere Fast” in the request).
“Nowhere Fast”
by D. M. Larson
(from "Operation Redneck")
JULIE
Maybe I should tell Jacob not to come at all.
He doesn't know how to keep a low profile. He's a major activist. He's always pushing some cause or another. He doesn't know when to quit.
I find it kind of sexy actually.
You know. That's the problem right there. Everyone here is a redneck. There isn't anything else. There's no other way to be.
I mean there is so much more out there. There is so much more we can make of ourselves but no one cares. But they are going nowhere fast and they are enjoying the ride. Everyone here just wants to be a redneck.
END OF MONOLOGUE
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"Little People" a comedy scene for 2 actors (1 male 1 female) from the play Operation Redneck
"Operation Redneck" is the story of three friends (Julie, Beth and Tina) who are roommates. Julie is dating a city boy named Jacob and he wants to visit her in the small town she lives in. She is worried about him fitting in and everyone want to help Jacob by turning him into the ultimate redneck like Tina's boyfriend JJ.
For permission to use this scene, contact doug@freedrama.net (please include the name of the scene “Little People” in the request).
“Little People”
by D. M. Larson
(from "Operation Redneck")
JACOB: What could go wrong?
JULIE: I can think a million things... and then some more.
JACOB: Don't worry, Julie. I have a feeling everything is going to turn out great.
JULIE: I wish I could stop worrying. But I know the people around here and I know my Pa and nothing ever turns out right for me.
JACOB: Think positive. Imagine world peace.
JULIE: I think I need to imagine a good day. That would be good enough for me.
JACOB: Before you go, can I ask you a question?
JULIE: Sure.
JACOB: This is the first time I've observed you in your natural habitat and I have to admit you're a very different person.
JULIE: (worried) Oh?
JACOB: In the city, you're confident and up for any kind of challenge. Here you're timid and almost afraid. (He can see JULIE is upset) Now I don't love you any less for it, please don't think that's what I'm saying. In fact, it means a lot to me that you're willing to show your vulnerable side.
JULIE: I have been so worried about how you'd react to the nervous wreck side of me.
JACOB: I love her just as much as the other Julie. In fact this side of you makes me feel needed, like you need me to take care of you.
JULIE: Is that good or bad?
JACOB: Good. Very good. (They kiss)
JULIE: Thanks, Jacob.
JACOB: Can I ask you something else?
JULIE: Sure.
JACOB: If this town and your family ties you up in knots like this, why did you come back again?
JULIE: For some reason, no matter how poorly I'm made to feel, I feel some strange connection to this town. It's probably some elaborate form of brain washing, but it didn't take my father much time to convince me to return. He really did need my help though.
JACOB: With his laundry?
JULIE: Not just that. He really needed to know that he hadn't been rejected by me after mom left.
JACOB: That's amazing, Julie. I know so many people in the city who think the ultimate act of kindness is putting their parents in a home. What you're doing seems much more civilized. Perhaps there is a lesson to be learned from the little people.
JULIE: Please don't let my daddy hear you call him the "little people."
JACOB: How about "country bumpkins" or "hicks from the sticks"?
JULIE: How about neither.
JACOB: I was kidding.
JULIE: I hope so.
JACOB: (Kisses her on the forehead) Run along to the store and get those things for me and I'll whip us up a meal you'll never forget.
JULIE: I certainly can agree that someone is going to whip up something.
JACOB: Think positive. Now go. I have a masterpiece to prepare.
END OF SCENE
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Read the entire play at: http://www.freedrama.net/opred.html
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"High Horse" short monologue for female from the play Operation Redneck
"Operation Redneck" is the story of three friends (Julie, Beth and Tina) who are roommates. Julie is dating a city boy named Jacob and he wants to visit her in the small town she lives in. She is worried about him fitting in and everyone want to help Jacob by turning him into the ultimate redneck like Tina's boyfriend JJ.
For permission to use this scene, contact doug@freedrama.net (please include the name of the scene “High Horse” in the request).
“High Horse”
by D. M. Larson
(from "Operation Redneck")
BETH
How about we give him a makeover?
Something that will make him fit in a little better. We can't have him showing up here in some t-shirt saying "Eat Beef and Die."
Oh, get off your high horse. You know free speech is only free when you talk about what everyone wants to hear. You can't tell me if I went to visit his family wearing a "I eat endangered species for breakfast" t-shirt that they wouldn't get upset at me. Face it. People only express themselves around people who feel the same way.
END OF MONOLOGUE
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Monologues with a Message - Top 10 solo scripts for actors that have something to say
I had a request for monologues that have a message. Here are some monologues that have something to say... they might not be in your face with their lessons but the message is there if you listen close.
Abuse - bullying:
"End the Hurting" - Short Dramatic Monologue (about bullying and abuse)-Male or Female (30 seconds)
Anti- war:
"Big Zero" Monologue - Male (1-2 minutes)
Bullying:
"Bug-Eyed Creature" - Monologue from play “Bullied, Bungled and Botched“ - Male (new)
Consumerism:
"Death by Dollars" - ShortComedic Monologue - Male (1.5-2 minutes)
Depression - mental illness:
"Demons" - Short Dramatic Monologue for male or female (3 minutes)
Depression - family:
"Forget About Me" - Longer Dramatic Monologue adapted from the monologues The Not So Perfect Child, Staying Power and Wishing
Heroes:
"Ready to be Shaped" - Monologue from the play "Between Good and Evil" - Male or Female (1.5 minutes)
Police murders:
"Nervous" - Short Dramatic Monologue from upcoming play "Death of an Insurance Salesman" - Female (1 minute)
Small town - small minds:
"Call Me Dumper" Comedy Monologue
Longer Female version (2 minutes)
Success - pressures of society:
"Happy with a Failure" - Monologue- Male or Female (1-2 minutes)
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MOST POPULAR FREE STAGE PLAY LINKS ON FREEDRAMA.NET
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Where did famous successful actors go to school? The best universities for acting opportunities
I always suggest going to college as a way to network and give you important connections to acting jobs for the future. Building a network is crucial for making your way as an actor. Going to a college can be a safe place to develop these connections to the movie industry.
So what are some good universities to go to? Let's take a look at where famous successful people in Hollywood went to college.
#1 Yale
The university the produced the most successful actors (I believe) is Yale. Alumni include Meryl Streep, Edward Norton, James Franco, Jodie Foster, David Duchovny and Clair Danes.
#2 Harvard
Alumni include Natalie Portman, Conan O'Brian, Ashley Judd, Matt Damon and Tommy Lee Jones
Tied for #3 - Columbia, USC, NYU, Vassar and Cal State
Columbia's famous students include Julia stiles, Amanda Peet and James Franco again! (Be like Franco and go to several schools)
USC's famous alumni include Will Farrell, Zachary Efron and George Lucas (okay, Lucas isn't an actor but he is well know in Hollywood).
NYU's famous students include - Meg Ryan, Adam Sandler and Selma Blair
Vassar - Lisa Kudrow, Meryl Streep (again!) and Anne Hathaway
Cal State notable alum include Steven Spielberg, Tom Hanks and Kevin Costner
I have to be honest here and admit not all these students finished their degrees (i.e. Steven Spielberg and Tom Hanks - what's up Cal State?). But they did go to college long enough to be inspired and find connections to jobs through a network they developed at the universities. If they hadn't gone to these schools, then they may not have found those key opportunities and meet those influential people that helped them get a start in Hollywood. And then you have actors like Meryl Streep and James Franco who can't get enough of school. Judging by all Meryl Streep's Academy Awards, that hard work in school paid off.
You'll also note that these schools are in California or New York, both locations that are great for finding acting jobs which is important.
Other schools to consider (with famous alumni)
University of Texas in Austin (Renee Zellweger and Matthew McConaughey) - Austin has a very active film industry so this is a good option as well if you aren't up for the LA or NYC.
UCLA (Ben Stiller)
And the weirdest school on the list that has nothing to do with acting
The University of Phoenix - Shaquille O'Neal and Lil Wayne - This is an odd choice for entertainers and I will leave it up to you to judge their abilities.
Post your questions about this post below and I will do my best to answer them.
So what are some good universities to go to? Let's take a look at where famous successful people in Hollywood went to college.
#1 Yale
The university the produced the most successful actors (I believe) is Yale. Alumni include Meryl Streep, Edward Norton, James Franco, Jodie Foster, David Duchovny and Clair Danes.
#2 Harvard
Alumni include Natalie Portman, Conan O'Brian, Ashley Judd, Matt Damon and Tommy Lee Jones
Tied for #3 - Columbia, USC, NYU, Vassar and Cal State
Columbia's famous students include Julia stiles, Amanda Peet and James Franco again! (Be like Franco and go to several schools)
USC's famous alumni include Will Farrell, Zachary Efron and George Lucas (okay, Lucas isn't an actor but he is well know in Hollywood).
NYU's famous students include - Meg Ryan, Adam Sandler and Selma Blair
Vassar - Lisa Kudrow, Meryl Streep (again!) and Anne Hathaway
Cal State notable alum include Steven Spielberg, Tom Hanks and Kevin Costner
I have to be honest here and admit not all these students finished their degrees (i.e. Steven Spielberg and Tom Hanks - what's up Cal State?). But they did go to college long enough to be inspired and find connections to jobs through a network they developed at the universities. If they hadn't gone to these schools, then they may not have found those key opportunities and meet those influential people that helped them get a start in Hollywood. And then you have actors like Meryl Streep and James Franco who can't get enough of school. Judging by all Meryl Streep's Academy Awards, that hard work in school paid off.
You'll also note that these schools are in California or New York, both locations that are great for finding acting jobs which is important.
Other schools to consider (with famous alumni)
University of Texas in Austin (Renee Zellweger and Matthew McConaughey) - Austin has a very active film industry so this is a good option as well if you aren't up for the LA or NYC.
UCLA (Ben Stiller)
And the weirdest school on the list that has nothing to do with acting
The University of Phoenix - Shaquille O'Neal and Lil Wayne - This is an odd choice for entertainers and I will leave it up to you to judge their abilities.
Post your questions about this post below and I will do my best to answer them.
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| Yale School of Drama is #1 on our list |
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"Hug Me and You All Die" comedy for 4 females from the published play Music Maybe
For the published play "Music Maybe"
- ISBN-13: 978-1519120106
(JJ is looking at Bay and studying him)
BAY
What's the matter? Do I have something on my face? I hate it when I get food on my face.
(Bay tries to use one of his cymbals as a mirror and looks at himself)
JJ
That's the problem, Bay. You're too perfect looking.
BAY
What?
JJ
This is a rock band. No one ever looks good in a rock band. Neat ain't cool.
BAY
What do you mean?
JJ
We gotta mess up your hair.
BAY
But I work so hard on it.
JJ
Yes, it's perfect, but perfect is so wrong for a rock star.
BAY
I'm not a rock star.
JJ
You won't be with that attitude.
BAY
Sorry.
JJ
Don't be sorry either. Rock stars are never sorry.
BAY
Never sorry. Got it.
(JJ messes up Bay's hair)
JJ
Hair is getting better.
(Mel enters. Slug follows sleepily)
SLUG
We gonna play some music or what?
MEL
You bet. I have some sheet music for you.
SLUG
Sheet music?
MEL
I thought the improvising was nice...
JJ
Nice?
MEL
But maybe some planning might be in order. After all, we are breaking new ground.
SLUG
With Na Na Hey Hey Good-bye?
MEL
Let's give it a try.
(If the actors are able to play the song, then they try it out here. If not, then the scene continues)
BAY
That's kind of mellow for a rock band isn't it?
JJ
And totally lame.
MEL
What's wrong? Not enough cow bell in the song for you?
JJ
Can't we do something with a bit more power to it? Like Costello's "Lover's Walk"?
BAY
I like the sound of that.
JJ
It goes something like this...
(They either play if actors are able or Mel stops them right away)
MEL
No, no. Wait a minute. This is my group and I say we play Na Na Hey Hey.
BAY
I thought this group belonged to all of us.
JJ
Either we all get a say in this or we all say "hey hey good-bye".
MEL
I started this band so I'm the leader. Deal with it.
JJ
I can't work like this. I quit.
MEL
Fine.
BAY
I don't know about this, Mel.
MEL
Fine, you quit too.
BAY
That isn't what I...
MEL
I know you and JJ got all buddy, buddy. Go with him for all I care.
JJ
Let's go, Bay.
(Bay notices Slug. Slug is crying but trying to hide it)
BAY
Slug? Are you okay?
SLUG
Yeah, whatever.
BAY
Are you crying?
SLUG
No, shut up.
JJ
Slug is crying.
MEL
What's the matter, Slug?
SLUG
Nothing.
MEL
Are you upset because we're fighting?
SLUG
I don't want to talk about it okay?
JJ
Look... I won't quit okay? I'll play "Na na na na."
SLUG
I hate "na na na na."
MEL
So you're crying because of the song.
SLUG
No, geez. Just drop it okay?
BAY
But we're all your friends, Slug. You can talk to us.
SLUG
Are you my friends? Really?
JJ
Of course we are.
SLUG
But friends don't quit right? They don't walk out on you.
BAY
That's why you're upset. Because we quit.
SLUG
Everyone's always quitting on me. My whole life... all the people I get to know... quit. I never do. I'm loyal. I stay. But they all leave me.
SLUG (CONT.)
Started with my dad... he quit on us when I was little and my mom quit on me even though he was still around. He quit caring and quit feeling anything. Everything I tried, every friend I made, quit on me in some way... I always felt like I failed them... and drove them away. But here... I finally thought I'd found a place where I could be a part of something. This time we've been together has been the best days of my life. Sounds pathetic but it's true. I've never been happier than I've been playing with all of you. Coming here each day gives me something to live for, something to make me drag my lazy carcass out of bed. I feel so alive here, playing with all of you. And it's more than just living... it's the fact I found a place in this world. A place where I matter and I fit in. I didn't feel lost anymore.
(Mel, JJ and Bay all look at each other sheepishly and then they look at Slug with smiles)
SLUG (CONT.)
Hug me and you all die.
MEL
What do you say we try something we a beat?
(Mel hands out a new song)
JJ
I say... yeah!
Bay
Let's rock!
SLUG
And roll!
(Lights fade to black and a song with strong drums plays - or if the actors are able, they can end the scene with a song)
END OF PLAY
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Available on Amazon.com
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Available on Amazon.com
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